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Kin of the Soul
Once upon a time there was Kin of the Heart where Angel and Xander learned to be friends. Now we're working towards something entirely different.Kin of the Soul
Slash: Angel/Xander, Angel/Spike
Rated: ADULT
banner by objectivelypink
Still spurting!! THREE chapters in Two days... read 'em in the right order!! I just want to get this written!! Oh the pain... the angst... the ANGELUS
( Part One ) ( Part Two ) ( Part Three ) ( Part Four ) ( Part Five ) ( Part Six ) ( Part Seven ) ( Part Eight ) ( Part Nine ) ( Part Ten ) ( Part Eleven ) ( Part Twelve ) ( Part Thirteen ) ( Part Fourteen ) ( Part Fifteen ) ( Part Sixteen ) ( Part Seventeen ) ( Part Eighteen ) ( Part Nineteen ) ( Part Twenty ) ( Part Twenty-One ) ( Part Twenty-Two ) ( Part Twenty-Three ) ( Part Twenty-Four ) ( Part Twenty-Five ) ( Part Twenty-six ) ( Part Twenty-Seven ) ( Part Twenty-eight ) ( Part Twenty-nine ) ( Part thirty ) ( Part Thirty-one ) ( Part Thirty-Two ) ( Part Thirty-Three )
"Hey, a little paint, some drywall and a wrecking ball, and we could make this place look like a big pile of garbage," Xander said, looking around the old theater. The roof leaked, which explained the funky smelling seats, and they had no electricity.
"Don't knock it. The back is dry and the sewer access is chained." Gunn almost managed to sound friendly. Almost. Of course he was glaring at Spike, so Xander wasn't surprised about the lack of love. Gunn and Alonna were big fans of the Faith and Graham Vampire Staking Show, but they weren't actually fans of vampires.
"And I really am not knocking it because it's better than nothing. It just needs a little help," Xander pointed out.
"If you want to fix it up, have at it, Whitebread. I got better things to do with my time."
"Charles!" Alonna stuck her head through the double doors from the lobby.
"Sorry!" Gunn held both hands up and backed away. "I'll try to be nicer to the vampire and his crew," Gunn promised in the most sarcastic voice Xander had ever heard.
"Okay, I'm guessing you're not a Spike fan, which I can understand, but just keep in mind that Spike and Angel actually pay the bills for Faith and Graham and all the fancy new equipment they've gotten for you," Xander said, gesturing toward Gunn's jacket. It was thin enough that it didn't do much to hide the flak jacket or the military knife.
"Angel... the guy who's gone all Darth Vader on your ass?"
Faith pushed past Alonna into the main theater. "Yeah, Angel. The guy who saved my sorry ass when I was so fucking lost that I killed someone. The guy who stuck by me when everyone else in my whole fucking life turned their back. The guy who forgave me when I all but pushed Xander down and raped him because I was so fucked up I didn't know the difference between someone liking me and someone wanting something out of me. If you have a problem with Angel, you have a fucking problem with me. Do we have a problem?" Faith demanded, stopping about two inches from Gunn's face. Xander held his breath and hoped the blood splatter didn't hit him, but right now it looked like someone was dying, and Xander was betting on Gunn. Gunn and Faith stared at each other, their faces oddly lit by the ray of sun shooting in from one broken window. Dust darted in and out of the beam so that it looked like they were in some sort of weird, shimmering halo.
Gunn backed off first with an odd twist of his body. "We're good. I just want it clear that I ain't opening a hotel for vamps."
"Five by five with me. You don't like vamps, I don't like assholes. So, you stay away from Spike and Angel and maybe I won't kill Joey."
Instead of getting angry at that taunt, Gunn laughed. "Yeah, that brother's got issues. I ain't telling him or Rondell about this deal, so you keep it on the down-low. My guys see your pet vamps, and I'm not—"
Gunn stopped with a gasp as Spike grabbed him and jerked him out of the light and into the shadow. Gunn was good—without panicking, he grabbed for his stake. However, Spike was better. He slapped Gunn's hand so hard that the crack echoed in the empty room and the stake rattled to the ground.
"Understand this, mate, I'm not anyone's pet anything. I've eviscerated more people than you've shaken hands with. Faith's family, so I'd do most anything for her, including not eviscerating you, but my patience has a limit."
"Play nice," Cordelia called from the stage. Xander had thought she went in back to figure out living quarters, but obviously she was vamp watching instead. "And Gunn, don't poke wild animals that can eat you. It's not smart."
"Very much unsmart," Xander agreed. Spike sort of tossed Gunn back, and he stumbled backwards down the aisle.
"So, is there running water because I can live without electricity, but I am very fond of my indoor plumbing," Xander quickly said before either of the guys could start fighting again. Faith stood there with her arms crossed and an expression that made it pretty clear that she was just daring Gunn to say anything else. It was Alonna who answered after she reached Gunn's side.
"The bathrooms work. Actually, they're public bathrooms, so you have two or three toilets for every person you have here. And you're welcome to stay for as long as you want."
Gunn gave his sister a blistering look, but he didn't contradict her.
Graham reached out and rested his hand on Gunn's shoulder. "One solder to another—thank you. I know Spike isn't exactly one of us, but he is an ally, and in war, you take the allies you find. We have the same goals, and Spike is powerful enough that unlike most of the minions you see on the streets, he doesn't feel any need to prove himself. That’s the safest sort of ally to have."
Gunn glanced over at Faith before turning his attention to Graham. "Whatever. I'm just saying I don't like vamps."
"Understood," Graham agreed. "I don't like the Iranians, but my general dislike for that group doesn't keep me from recognizing a good ally. I worked in the field with a man who I trusted with my life—a man born and raised in Ravar, Iran and who prayed several times a day to Allah. When I first started working with him, I wasn't comfortable with the situation, but I trusted Riley when Riley said he was a good man. Over time, I learned that Riley was right—that I could trust him."
"So, I just trust a vamp?"
Graham shook his head. "No, you never trust an ally unless you've seen evidence with your own eyes that he's trustworthy, but on the word of a trusted ally, you should give someone a chance. Otherwise, you're in danger of allowing your own prejudices to overtake common sense."
Spike just stood with his arms crossed, but from his stance, Xander could tell he was ready for a fight. He was probably hoping for a fight because the frustration level was getting a little high for all of them. Hell, Xander was about ready to pick a fight with someone.
"Hey, I have an idea," Xander said, "Let's go on patrol. There is way too much hostility in this room for anyone to stay inside without breaking walls, and as much as I appreciate all the practice with my drywall skills, I don't plan to stay here long enough to do any fixing up."
This time it was Gunn who answered with a snort. "Who'd notice if they broke a few walls in this dump?"
"Yeah, you've already put holes in most of them," Alonna teased him with a smile. Gunn smiled back at her, and for one second, the tough expression faded into something fond.
"Yeah, well do what you want with this place," Gunn said. "But I don't think I want to go on patrol with a vamp. I'll just wait and see whether he eats the rest of you, first." With that, Gunn backed away from them, up the aisle and toward the lobby. Xander figured the show was over because Cordelia vanished back behind the main curtain, and Faith started heading for the stage area. She probably wanted to check the security while Cordelia figured out how to set up quarters private enough that they weren't all sitting on top of each other.
"Spike looked Graham up and down. So, I'm not one of you?" Spike sucked air through his front teeth. Someone was in serious danger of getting sat on.
"You're family, but you aren't human," Graham offered. "And I am sorry about Gunn's attitude."
Spike just shrugged. "Boy shows some good sense. If he's going to go playing vamp hunter, it's good for him to distrust demons. Vamps use all sorts of bait, including playing Lestat when it serves their purpose. There are all sorts of idiots who believe the 'tortured soul' rot that some of them pull."
A flash of pain went through Xander. For Angel, it hadn't been a ploy. He'd suffered with his soul for a hundred years, and just when he was starting to learn how to live with himself, Jenny Giles had come along and ripped it away.
"Enough of this rot. I really am ready to kill something. Is anyone coming?" Spike looked at Graham, but it was Xander who answered.
"Count me in, I'm starting to actually understand why you and Faith tend to beat the crap out of things. Either my testosterone levels are rising or I have finally the point at which I can no longer process any more frustration. And considering I went to high school with Harmony, I have pretty high frustration tolerance levels."
"You never killed the Slayer when she complained about that endless string of losers she dated. I think that's proof enough, pet."
"Slightly pointlike," Xander agreed.
"I thought I felt something one street down, so let's see if we can't flush out something big and bad." Spike started heading for the door.
"You do know the girls are going to kill us for leaving them to set up the living quarters, right?" Xander checked as he followed Spike. Spike turned around and walked backwards so he could wiggle his eyebrows.
"Bloody hell, yes. I have to give my queen something to get brassed off about. I won't have her brooding like Peaches." Spike gave a leer that made it clear that not even tragedy would slow down his sex life. Xander was starting to really admire Cordelia's stamina.
"You two have fun killing things. I'm going to check to see that the toilets actually flush," Graham offered.
Xander stopped. "Maybe I should—"
"Get away and work off some frustration," Graham cut him off. "I may not be as good as you with a wrench, but I can get a toilet working. Probably. If not, you can fix whatever I break when you get back," Graham said. "So get out and go kill something for me." Turning around, Graham trotted toward the stage area where Cordelia and Faith had vanished.
"Come on, pet. Let's go see if we can't work off some frustration," Spike threw an arm around Xander's shoulder and practically pulling him toward the lobby. The sewer entrance was off the manager's office, which pretty much meant that some sort of demon had originally built the theater. Then again, based on the funky lack of logical planning, Xander figured out that big chunks of the city had been built by demons. Demon had the non-logical logic going. Spike unchained the entrance and dropped down into the tunnel, his coat billowing up over his head.
"But Graham..." Xander called down into the tunnel.
"Is a big boy. Let him deal with the plumbing for once," Spike called up. Xander sighed and climbed down onto the ladder. He wasn't going to win this fight even if he suddenly didn't want to kill anything. He wasn't sure he even could. If they couldn't find Jenny, they might end up doing the big showdown with Angelus, and Xander wasn't sure what he would do if he had a stake in his hand and Angelus right in front of him. Spike was waiting for him at the bottom of the ladder.
"Should we chain it up?" Xander asked, gesturing up.
"Let Faith have a little fun if anyone's stupid enough ta try and challenge her," Spike said before he reached out and caught Xander's hand in his own before leading Xander out of the small island of dull light filtering down from above and into the dark tunnel. The neighborhood had really run down because the sewers were almost not disgusting, which usually meant that the buildings above were either empty or full of non-working plumbing. They passed two junctions, and Spike still held Xander's hand as they passed into an area with a series of grates that allowed dim shafts of light from the late afternoon sun to filter in. The tires of the passing cars made an odd whining noise as they passed the grates.
Xander looked at Spike suspiciously. He didn't need the help finding his way with the extra light, but Spike was still holding his hand tightly. "You're worried about me."
"I don't bloody worry."
"Then why are you looking at me the way you looked at Faith after she came back from Washington?"
"I am not."
"Am too."
"Not."
"And now..." Xander poked Spike in the stomach. "You're trying to annoy me out of being totally wigged out."
"I don't even bloody understand what the hell that means. Have you considered learning English, you know, the Queen's English instead of that rot you talk?"
"Har har." Xander tried to smile, but his lips just wouldn't do it. If anything, he could feel anger and grief and fear pushing up into his head like air pushing into a balloon until it was ready to pop.
"We'll get this fixed," Spike said with a sudden seriousness that didn't match the teasing tone of just seconds earlier.
"And if we can't?" Xander hated asking. He wanted to pretend that everything would be okay, that good always won. But somehow when he'd lost that illusion about the time he'd figured out that 'human, good; demon, bad' didn't actually work. Some people, like his father, were worthless and lazy at heart. And others, like Jenny Giles, were just pretty much evil. Not Spike evil where he just wanted what he wanted, but the sort of evil that thinks it knows everything and that it can fuck with people's lives because it knows better than everyone else in the whole universe. Xander didn't like that kind of evil. And the sad thing was that he used to be that sure of himself. At one point, he was so sure he knew all the answers, and now he didn't know anything, and he couldn’t help but wonder what was going to happen if they couldn't figure this out. His nightmares were full of images of Angel's face exploding into dust.
Spike didn't answer, but he reached out and rested his palm against Xander's cheek. "We'll get there, pet. Don't count Peaches out, yet."
Xander's eyes were hot, and his nose had that weird itchy feeling that meant he was in danger of snotting on someone. "I want him back," Xander confessed in a whisper.
"We both do, pet."
The sound of clapping hands sent Spike leaping forward with a snarl. Angelus walked around a bend in the sewer ahead of them. "That was just beautiful. Very touching. William, William, William. It doesn't matter how much I beat you, I just can't beat all those emotions out, can I?" He strolled forward, filling the tunnel not only with his size, but with his personality. Angelus was somehow just bigger than Angel. He filled the space and sucked the oxygen out of the room until Xander couldn't breathe.
Spike didn't answer, but his body shifted defensively as Angelus stalked closer. Xander suddenly realized that Spike couldn't easily retreat with him in the way, and the close quarters would favor Angelus in a fight. Backing away, Xander searched the walls of the tunnels for a ladder. He needed to get up and out before the fight started. That was about the only way he could help.
"Look at the little rabbit try and find a way out of his hole. Oh William, he doesn't even trust that you can protect him. It's a good thing I've come to collect him." Angelus stopped and raised a hand to rest it on the hilt of his sword.
"What's the matter? Can't find anyone else who will let you bugger them? I could give you a few lessons, mate."
Spike's words hit a nerve because Angelus' eyes flashed yellow. "Careful boy."
"That's the thing. I'm not your boy. Even before the witch stuck her fingers in your head and stirred, you'd figured that one out."
"I created you. You're whatever I tell you to be," Angelus now totally vamped out.
"Too late for that. You chose to leave me and Dru, so we just had to find our own way."
"I never left you," Angelus snarled. "But the gypsies' curse is gone." He sounded so damn pleased, and Xander somehow thought a happy Angelus was not a good thing, but if Angelus wanted mind games, Xander had grown up watching his parents verbally rip into each other into little tiny pieces before ripping into him. Then he'd graduating to watching Spike and Angel. They might not have meant their barbs, but Xander certainly knew how to throw a verbal punch.
"Why would a gypsy take your curse off?" Xander blurted before he could lose his nerve. He was so not the one to be playing mind games with Angelus, but there wasn't any other way he could help.
"Xand, get out," Spike ordered, but Xander ignored him and focused on Angelus.
"The gypsies still hate you. Jenny Giles hates you. She blames you... well you and me and Spike, but mostly you... for ruining her marriage. She thinks you set the United States military after her, and that was more Riley than anyone else, but that's not my point."
"I'm going to have to train you to keep your mouth shut, aren't I?" Angelus asked in a sadistic voice, but Xander recognized the flash of doubt in Angelus' face.
"Um, if you want me to be quiet, probably, because I say random shit when I'm scared out of my mind, but still that is not explaining why someone who hates you would go and make you all happy and set you free. That is sounding inexplicably illogical for someone who loves logic and computers and geeking out over programming code."
"Boy's got a point," Spike added. "That's what Green Bean came over to tell us, that someone had put a spell on the hotel but it was so helpful that it slipped right past the Furies' protective spell. You bloody well know you'd never let that Giles bint cast a spell on you, but that's exactly what she's done."
"I can deal with her later," Angelus said dismissively. "My concern right now is that I seem to have misplaced something that's mine."
Xander swallowed as Angelus looked past Spike and focused on him. If Xander just ignored everything that had happened in the last day or so, he could pretend that this was still Angel, that the expression was one of love and desire. Angelus wanted him. And a little part of Xander wanted Angelus because he was the only part of Angel that he could still touch, but that little part was quickly shoved in a corner by all the fear and terror that rose up like a wave.
"You're not taking him, mate," Spike warned. His voice was soft, but the warning was clear.
"Are you challenging me, boy?"
"I guess I am."
"I'm going to make you pay for that."
Spike laughed. All the hairs on Xander's arms stood up. "Um, Spike, let's not poke the Master Vampire, please."
"Yes, boy, listen to the human," Angelus agreed with a smile for Xander that made his heart twist in confusion. "If you aren't careful, you're going to pay as dearly as Penn."
"You can try, Peaches, but you seem to be forgetting something."
"Oh?"
"You were a vampire for what, a hundred, a hundred and fifty years? And then you turned into a pathetic shadow crawling through alleys eating rats and slowly starving and saving kitties and puppies."
"You will pay for that, boyo." The smile left Angelus' face as he glared at Spike. Xander could feel his heart pound so fast it was actually painful in his chest.
"Maybe not," Spike answered with a casual shrug. "Darla kept you under her thumb. You never were a Master Vampire around her. You were her toy, her bauble. She kept you around just so she could control some big, strong man the way she'd been controlled her whole fucking life."
Angelus had gone perfectly still, and Xander stopped breathing. This wasn't teasing. This wasn't some attempt to get an advantage while sparring. This was full out verbal nuclear holocaust.
"But Darla tossed me out on my ear when I wasn't more than thirty years turned. I've spent eighty years as a Master Vampire. I've controlled territories and taken three slayers."
"Weak ones," Angelus spit out.
"But slayers, mate. I took them and I could take another any time I wanted."
"She's mine. Touch her and I will pour holy water in yer eyes." Angelus had barely finished before he leaped forward with hands outstretched. Spike twisted, but in the close quarters, he couldn't totally escape. Angelus caught him by the arm and slammed him into the side of the sewer tunnel with the thud that Xander could almost feel through the concrete. Spike started slithering to the ground, but as he fell, his legs tangled with Angelus' and before Xander could recognize the danger, Spike pulled Angelus to the ground and had swung his arm around and sunk a stake deep into the back of Angelus' shoulder.
Angelus roared and leaped up, but Spike was already on his feet, crouched and ready for another round. For a half second, Xander thought they were going to throw themselves at each other, but then Angelus chuckled. It was the sort of sound Angel never made. "You might have learned a trick or two, but you can never beat me."
Spike took a step back and stretched his neck as if they'd only been sparring and not trying to rip each other's limbs off. "We'll see."
"William, William, William." Angelus shook his head sadly. "You never understood strategy. You should have killed Wesley because he has proven quite helpful. For example, he tells me that you don't want to bring in the Sunnydale forces. You want to find a way to fix this. You don't want to kill me, and that means you will never beat me. So, it's time for you to come home, boy."
"I never liked doing things the easy way." Spike backed up another step so that he was so close Xander could reach out and touch him.
"Touch him and I'll cut off the offending limb," Angelus snarled, his yellow gaze focused on Xander again. "He's mine."
"He was Angel's," Spike disagreed.
"No, he was mine." Angelus lowered his head and smiled right at Xander. "You gave me more freedom under the soul. The soul never would have touched you, so you brought me out, a m'fhear. You convinced Angel to revel in his pleasure instead of torturing himself like some sort of buffoon. You wanted my hands on your body, feeling your heat. In the end, your touch freed me from the soul, not the witch's spell. Think back to our last time in bed. That wasn't the soul. The soul never held you down and made you cry out his name as you begged for release."
Xander swallowed, every thought stolen out of his head.
Angelus chuckled. "Oh yes, you know the truth, my boy." He turned to Spike. "If you want to play Master Vampire, be my guest, William. Give me the boy and the slayer, and you can do whatever you want with that human you've allowed to chain you up like a pet."
"No deal."
"Then you'll lose everything. I can't decide if I should torture that bitch of yours or just turn her and teach her how to properly serve a master."
Spike snarled viciously, and Xander reached out to rest his fingers against Spike's shoulder. At first, it didn't seem to be working, but then Spike shook his head with a slow chuckle that echoed Angelus' own. "Good try, but I'm not going to lose control. If you want Xander and Faith, you'll have to bloody well fight for them."
"Then I will, William. I can come after you any time I want."
"How did you do that?" Xander blurted out before it occurred to him that Angelus was probably not going to answer him.
Angelus chuckled. "See how you're mine, a m'fhear? You look to me for answers. You ache to have my hands on your skin. Come home to me now and the punishment for leaving will be much less severe."
Spike snorted. "Not like I gave him a choice. Took him and Wesley in hand and forced them out of there."
"And then you gave Wesley back. Maybe you're trying to make sure I win and force you back into your place under me. Do you miss my cock, boy?" Angelus asked. "Why else would you send a magic user back to me knowing that I had all the life force I needed to track the boy?"
"You have my life force?" Xander asked, wondering if this was some Star Wars reference he totally didn't understand.
"Semen, pet," Spike clarified. Xander flinched because Angelus really did have that. They'd had lots and lots of sex, and somewhere in the middle of all the sex, Xander had gotten lazy on changing the sheets. Unless he could smell it or Angel ripped the sheets, he just figured why bother.
"So, I can track you easily. Come with me, and you'll make it much easier for Spike to hide the others. Go with him, and I'll track you straight back to the lair. I'll torture Cordelia until she begs for death, and you can live with knowing you could have stopped it." The smile on Angelus' face was nothing like Angel, and if Xander had a chance to kill Angelus right then, he might have done it. He knew what Angelus was capable of, and the thought of him touching Cordelia made his skin crawl.
"That argument might actually work on him," Spike said, "only, it's not his choice." Spike threw something, and a bright flare filled the tunnel with light and heat so vivid that for a second, Xander thought the top of the tunnel had blown off and sunlight was streaming down. He opened his mouth to cry out for Angel and Spike, but then strong hands caught him by the arms, and before he could even blink the bright spots out of his eyes, someone was hurrying him through the tunnels while swearing in a thick Cockney accent. Xander thought it was pretty sad that he wasn't sure if he was relieved or disappointed that Spike was the one to claim him.
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