His father was a disciplinarian, and in Jayne's mind that has come to look mighty shiny.

His step-father was annoyed by Jayne's refusal to get over his father's death and turned that discipline into something that would probably be called abuse.

So, I think different people would have different answers, but I see his father's death and his step-father's asshatiness as leaving deep scars that are leading to his needs and his difficulty admitting to his needs.